In the fall of 2015, I found myself in an unusual church environment. What made this gathering unique was the assortment of ages who were sitting in a circle around me. Glancing around the room I saw a variety of people from our congregation—a pre-teen young man, an aging widow, a recently married couple, and a seventy-two-year-old elder.
There was a total of five different generations represented in our small group of fourteen people.
How did I end up surrounded by such a diverse group of people?
I should confess that I knew the answer. I was the reason this diverse group had gathered on this Sunday evening, tucked in a small room in our church building. These different age groups were present because I had invited each of them to help me with a research project.
Researching Intergenerational Ministry
I was working towards a degree that focused on intergenerational spiritual formation. In other words, I wanted to explore what might happen if different generations in our church carried out spiritual practices together.
The reason for focusing on this topic was simple. I noticed a growing trend in my church and others that much of congregational life keeps different age groups separate from each other.
We had a congregation of generational cul-de-sacs—we co-existed alongside of each other, but we were not really connected.
The structure of our building separated the kids from the youth from the adults. The systems in the life of our church created subcultures of learning and formation. We had a congregation of generational cul-de-sacs—we co-existed alongside of each other, but we were not really connected.
What might happen if we intentionally came together in a formative way? How might God work in this intentionally intergenerational environment?
To answer these questions, I carried out the following project.1 I gathered with two, separate small groups of people for a total of eight weeks. One group met on Sunday nights, the other on Wednesday nights. Each group was a different collection of people, but both groups had five different generations present. Ages ranged from ten years old to eighty years old. We took an hour each week to gather in a circle, spend time sharing about our lives, and then reading Scripture together through a practice called Dwelling in the Word.2 This way of reading creates a contemplative and communal engagement of Scripture for the participants.
The Contemplative Dimension
The contemplative dimension focuses on one passage of Scripture. We read the text twice and then participants are given two questions: First, what sparks your imagination about this passage? This question is about noticing something interesting in the passage.
Second, what is a question you would want to ask a Bible expert about this passage? This question offers an opportunity for the participants to give honest inquiry about Scripture.
The Communal Dimension
The communal dimension occurs after the reading and individual pondering of the text. Each member of the group is then asked to pair up with a partner and share their reflections on one of the two questions. In my project, different age groups spent time with another generation reflecting on the passage together.
The group was encouraged to listen with deep attentiveness, as if what the other person saying was the most important thing they ever heard. They were encouraged to listen as if God was speaking to them through their partner.
Our group would then come back together and spend time sharing what each member heard. They were not to share their personal reflections, but those of their partner. They were reporting back to the group as a kind of faithful representative—here is what I heard from my partner. At the conclusion of our time, we would then discern together what God was teaching us through the passage and the collective responses of all the members of the group.
Generational Dynamics
My research focused on the generational dynamics unfolding in the group. Therefore, I spent time interviewing the different members halfway through the project and at the end. Striking to me was how everyone appreciated this intergenerational experience. They were glad they had this time with other ages, to learn from them, and to see the ways God was working through them.
The group voiced a collective affirmation that we needed to do this more in our church. They reported how much better and more unified our church might be if we took time to listen to the other age groups in our church.
Guideposts for Unity Among Generations
This project experience continues to shape how I imagine what it might look like for the generational body of Christ to find greater unity within local communities of faith. Instead of perpetuating barriers between age groups, what kind of church might be formed if we listened for unity between different generations in our church?
Instead of perpetuating barriers between age groups, what kind of church might be formed if we listened for unity between different generations in our church?
How might a church leader facilitate and encourage this posture between the members of our congregation?
Growing out of this experience, I want to offer a few guideposts to leaders who desire more for the different ages of their church to come together in meaningful and mutual ways.
Intentional Proximity
Leaders need to create opportunities for different age groups to be around each other. Age-silos are the default in most congregations. Therefore, we need to be more intentional in our church gatherings.
It will take effort to create a new Bible class, launch a different kind of small group, and think creatively about currently existing structures and systems. But good fruit can grow in our church when we create intergenerational environments.
Where in the life of our church can we bring different ages together in an intentional way?
Incarnational Presence
This principle calls leaders to something more than just getting different age groups together in the same space. We must also consider the dynamics of our togetherness. The model of Jesus, who became like us in every way can help shape our relationships with other ages in our church (Hebrews 2:17).
We must be willing to “try on” the perspectives of others in hopes to form deeper relationships with them.3
How can we encourage deeper engagement and connection between different age groups in our church?
Interviewing Posture
In the same way my group members would report back to the rest of the group as a faithful representative, so we must take on a similar posture in our generational engagement. This posture of “careful listening” cultivates a spirit of inquiry, learning from, and trust that God might be speaking through this other person.4 Making every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace includes our conversations (Ephesians 4:3). We need to pay attention to how and if we are paying attention to other generations in the life of our church.
How can we cultivate deeper listening between the generations of our church?
Unity Among Generations
These principles will not solve every generational problem, but I do believe they can help curb against the tragic tendency towards generational division. Get around people of a different age group. Learn to be fully present to them. Listen in ways that trust God is speaking through them.
A church who seeks to develop these rhythms in their congregation can grow into something that reflects generational unity in Christ.
- For a detailed summary of my project and the research, see Wilson McCoy, “All Ages Learning Together,” in InterGenerate: Transforming Churches Through Intergenerational Ministry, ed. Holly Allen (Abilene: Abilene Christian University Press, 2018), 151–59. ↩︎
- For more on this way of reading Scripture, see Pat Taylor Ellison and Patrick Keifert, Dwelling in the Word: A Pocket Handbook (St. Paul: Church Innovations, 2011). ↩︎
- For guiding principles for conversations between different age groups, see Engaging All Generations: A Strategic Toolkit for Creating Intergenerational Faith Communities, ed. Cory Seibel (Abilene: Abilene Christian University Press, 2021), 223–29. ↩︎
- For more on the art of careful listening within our communities of faith, see Heather M. Gorman and Mark Nelson, Lunchroom Theology: Pushing Tables Together in a Fractured World (Richmond: 100 Movements, 2024), 111–23. ↩︎
